Confessions of a self-centered, judgmental hypocrite

We’ve all been "lucky" enough to encounter one...the girl who knows she has it all together. Not only does she have it all together, she's going to help you get yourself together. She has an endless supply of unwanted advice on dating, parenting, and life choices. If she isn't comfortable enough to share her knowledge with you, she will certainly have no qualms about sharing it with your circle of friends…snide remarks and dirty looks included.

I vividly remember the self-righteous queen of my past. In fact, if I could go back in my life 15 years or so, I'd smack myself! I know we are supposed to love everyone as they are, but my younger self REALLY deserves a little roughing up. Back then, you could try to reason with her, but I promise, she wouldn’t listen. She was far too smart to hear what you were saying and was probably far too busy judging someone else to take the time to listen. The one thing she had going for her was that she did not discriminate--she would judge her own family members just as quickly as judge a stranger at the grocery store.

I recently encountered a victim of one of these kind of gals. It broke my heart to hear her talk about how she felt guilty about not bonding properly with her new baby because she couldn’t breast feed. She went on to say that she often receives comments about how she is too young to be a parent (she’s 25), and the dirty looks she and her husband get because he is seven years older than her. She stays at home most days, because it's just easier than going out into the cruel world to face the judgment.

I talked with her for at least an hour and encouraged her, validating her feelings of self worth and telling her to not give up hope. I also told her about my own self righteous past, but how several years later now, I'm singing a different tune. Turns out, the girl I was didn’t know much about life...and life dealt her a number of tough lessons. HUMBLE would be a good word to describe her disposition. Now she spends her time loving on women who don’t think they are enough, encouraging them to find their place and helping them get their SHINE on!

As women we need to encourage and love one another, it's good for your soul!

--Melissa

Have you encountered one of these women? How did it make you feel? Were you this type of person in the past? How did you make a change? We'd love to hear your story!